First semester of senior year is long gone, Christmas is past, and now in a few days I’ll return to Dublin for a good long winter break.

Some of my friends have already been back and said it wasn’t very nostalgic — too soon, perhaps, to really mean anything yet.  I don’t know if I’m looking for nostalgia.  It’s not like going back to high school and saying, “Oh, remember sitting here at lunch?  And you sat there, and she sat there, and I always ate a peanut butter sandwich and Yoo-hoo.”  I won’t be saying, “Aw, I loved coming here.”  It’ll be, “I love coming here.  Is there anywhere else we can go?”

Friends said crossing the Liffey and cutting through Trinity didn’t feel like memory lane, just another day in Dublin.  This disappointed them, but it’s what I want.  I want the next few weeks to be like I never left.  And before I left, I was just living — not thinking about what I would think of things later, but just doing things.  I want to constantly recreate what the city means to me, just like any other day.  I want to hit the old haunts at some point, soak in the familiarity of going down the street for a pint just because, dancing to indie and ironic music at Doyle’s, and dozing off in a Luas seat, but I also want to check out restaurants I haven’t noticed before, explore the outlying districts, and find Iveagh Gardens once and for all.  I’ve spent the last semester staring at my ceiling thinking of everything that happened last year.  It’s high time to paper over old memories with new ones.

It’s a city I know very well, with lots of corners I don’t know at all.  Sorry, Boston, but you’re a city I’ll never know.  You and I are long-standing acquaintances who will never quite get each other.  I can’t learn you, your infrastructure, or the things that matter to you, and you’ll never try with me.  This other place that I’m heading back to, this little city that quietly builds and builds, is calling me back.  It was a pit stop for many, and while it may not be where I’ll forever rest my head, for now it’s where I’ll keep on living.

And in the summer, when I’m through with college and stepping into the first day of the rest of my life, it’s where I’ll go.

It’s incredibly rude to remark on anyone’s weight, no matter which end of the spectrum it’s on.  Not everyone who’s lost weight is happy about it, and not everyone who says they’re not happy about it is in eating-disorder denial.  Not everyone can explain why it continues to happen even as spirits soar and fatty meals are consistently consumed.  Not everyone wants to look differently — some people were perfectly happy where they were.  Not everyone is flattered when attention is brought to how loosely their watch fits on their wrist.

That’s because for some people it’s just plain embarrassing and confusing and unwanted.

I’ve had almost the exact same haircut since the day I stood up for myself in third grade and said, “I am NOT cutting my hair like a boy anymore!!!”  Since then it’s just been shoulder length, layered, and for the past five years with side bangs.  And that’s really been fine with me, I don’t mind it at all and haven’t seen another hairstyle I think would really suit me.  (Probably because my projection of myself is all about consistency.)

Now, for the past year, in an effort to save money, I’ve been cutting my own hair.  With the same scissors I use to cut my yarn.  I know, that’s horrible for my hair, you don’t have to tell me or my split ends that.  It worked for about two months, but since then my hair’s just a ridiculous mess, all uneven and choppy and shapeless.  Not to mention the back-and-forth I have with its texture and cleanliness.

So for Christmas I asked for a haircut, and my mom one-upped me by saying I could go crazy, get it done however I want, and get highlights.  That’s where you come in.  I’m not really looking for a change, per se, but with this option on the table I might as well make the most of my head, right?  What do you suggest?

Here are my requirements:

• No blunt/full bangs.
• No obvious highlights — I don’t want to look striped in any kind of way.  Just kind of… better.
• Preferably just a one-off on the highlights — I don’t want to be picking up root touch-up kits or anything.  But I obviously also don’t want my roots to show after a few weeks either.

I’m very low maintenance about it, I’m really not looking for a big change.  But any tips on what to ask for so I can make sure my annual haircut turns out really nice?

I used to be the queen of being alone.  But somewhere along the line it became the easiest way to cripple me.

I’ll pour a little coffee before Christmas so I can afford the gifts I’d love to give.