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    Thursday, January 10th, 2008

    I learned from the best

    I'm in the middle of cleaning my room at home for the first time in probably 2 years, and I just found a stack of papers that my mom has apparently collected--report cards, SAT scores, certificates--and amidst the pile was a poem I wrote for her one Mother's Day. I think this was from sophomore year of high school. I completely forgot about it, but I couldn't not post it:

    I know that you hate poetry
    unless it's that which does rhyme,
    and were this not my own idiosyncrasy
    I wouldn't waste my time.
    This one has no measure,
    no beat or iambic pentameter,
    because it's late at night and after days of tests
    I can barely write a letter.
    But I digress, I will make my point:
    You're the bomb, you're awesome, you're gellin',
    and if I had my own talk show,
    you'd be on all the time, like Ellen.
    I'm a total mess and my direction's weak
    and my self-esteem is low,
    and as a mom you're quick to blame yourself,
    but I insist it's not so.
    You made me funny and smart and quick,
    and you taught me all of life's rules,
    so for everything that's wrong with me,
    well, I blame the schools.
    I had no time to buy you things
    since homework consumes my hours,
    so instead of buying diamond rings,
    I'll showcase my magic powers.
    Whatever your heart desires,
    whatever tasks needs to be done,
    call upon me, the greatest wizard of time,
    I will be your number one.
    To honor your love this Mother's day
    I grant you your wishes three.
    Of course, I should do this on non-holidays, too,
    but I'm a selfish son of a B.
    The rhyme is through, you're free to go,
    but here are my parting words:
    I love you, Mama, you're truly the best,
    now let's go beat the crap out of some nerds.

    Your daughter,
    Molly S. Griffin

    Replies: 1 Comment

    kage said at 02:05 AM, 1.11.08:

    hahahahaha amazing

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